Sacrifice for something

 We often see instances of sacrifices around us. In the less developed nation that India used to be when we were growing up, we had seen how a mother would eat less so her child eats more, or how one kid would give up his schooling as he had to start earning money for his family. 

I don't think sacrificing is ever easy. The things which make up who we are, those things are the only ones that we let go of. A so called part of you, physical or non, will part with you. 

The only thing that motivates a person wo give up one of his part is the vision of bigger picture, in front of which (s)he is hardly anything. The mother would not even think twice before giving her share of food to her kid. It's the kid that has to grow, that her share of growth is no more important than kid's. The elder member would be content seeing that his siblings are attending to school because of his working. That his education is nothing in front of the little kids who still have scope to change the world outside their homes.

The soldier ready to give up his life for saving a civilian, the father eager to save a million for well being of his kids... these all are stories which may just indicate that every living being knows that there are things greater than they themselves. 

This is true of everything. There is always something greater than anu other thing. When one sacrifices a thing, (s)he gets closer to the nature, his share of ego (that kept him/her in a separate shell) has got parted with the thing let gone. Sacrificing is the truest , credible way to lose one's self slowly and slowly.

A heartful bow down for parts of those who sacrifice :)  

Importance of parents

 It has come out of a discussion among us siblings, but still the talks made me very emotional. My sis said that when papa mummy are gone, she will be nothing and she will not come to house. 

I hold the same thought. I will be nothing without my parents. But I will have to be something, because I created my kids, whom I have to nurture till they become ready. 

I can write a lot on my father, but that will be maybe at some other time. For now let me just write down what comes from inside...

I love him. He is like a kid now, getting angry every now and then, but I remember the time he was like a lion. That what he did was right only, and could not have been wrong in any way. May be with time, he got weak and made some less right decisions, but that will never remove the mark he has put by doing the things he has done right. Spending on kids education, girl or boy ; never differentiating between gender (I actually came to know that some parents differentiate after I read about these issues in college time) ; selling land to a petty couple so that their family gets flourished, and never looking back again at what he had just donated ; coming out of village when he realised the intentions internally in family ; regularly giving back money to his village home till the theft incident ; still keeping in touch with his brothers ; never leaving contact with someone who works with him ; leaving everyone feeling good, if there was no altercation of course.

Many many more points.

It is because of him that I studied. Maybe I can say once his tears saved me from thinking about taking any step which would bring any harm to me. I was never the same person when I saw tears for me in his eyes. He said how can my son go through so much pain. His tears were the medicine I needed. 

He has always wished for my growth, that I become a great contributor to the world. Not much these days, since I am just working like a common man now.

His opinion for every topic, both for and against that topic. It's super funny. The way he has protected my mother from any ill happening, I bow to him. He remains inspiration and a guiding light for many issues I come across in life, although not all. But that's ok. 

I remember the food I enjoyed in childhood. I do not enjoy the food now seldom, but that may be because of age. The food mother made, I remember. I will miss it, even now I miss. But this happens to everyone. Old times are cherishable.

There are many old things about my family which I remember and feel so good. Even in less, we did not worry. We were kids, with mother father as our pillar to hold on to. 

Lights used to go, we would go to our terrace, I would fan using newspapers or hand fan... all this happening in clear moonlight. Father sleeping on his cot alone. Mother and others sleeping around only. I would see some people walking by road in the moonlight. Would just think who made them go out of their house so late, then would think they can easily rush to their home is something happens.

Then light would come and we would go to our rooms. Father would also wake up, smoetimes he would go inside. Other times, will sleep outside only. He would bathe us everymorning, chanting the dohas and shlokas, which we hardly value now. Though I have started valuing them now.

His love for Ramayan. Mummy's faith in the unthinkable god, the unstatable God. Both my parents sometimes look like epitome of how a bhakt should be. But I have not seen this part of the world, the group of people who just live by God's name. So can not state about epitome with confidence. Just I feel that this is how dedicatedly a prayer should be done, if done.

Both of them keep working and laziness does not come near them. If it comes, it does not take precendance over other works. They tolerate for hope of better future. They warn about unhealthy signs. They love each other like friends and master-slave both ways, together. They show love whenever they feel, but control doing criticism immediately. for actions they do not approve of. 

They are weak now, but they used to be made of A1 class marble. I still see them as A1 class marble, having their shine hidden behind the wrinkled skin. Like they ignored my wrong works in my childhood, I can not help but ignore the things I do not agree to. 

We will also come to this stage. The cycle comes back around. Life comes back to teach us, I hope I am told what mistakes I did before reaching an old age, so that I make amends of it if possible. I wish the same for my parents too, however right I believe they are. They are also humans and prone to errors. 

For life there is no better human hero I have to look up to, other than my parents.

Life of a Soldier

I am not very much a believer in a religion by name of Hinduism, but I am like in concurrence with almost all of the things related to life and death mentioned in Hinduism. In my opinion, Hinduism word was never devised by our founding forefathers. From Sindhu (The Indus River) , Hindustan came and from Hindustan, Hindu came. Labelling a religion made it specific to certain group of people who agreed to most of the things preached by the religion, and if some thing mentioned in the religion did not appear agreeable to the mind, they would abide by the thing mentioned in the labelled religion.

I believe everything is as it is. Nothing (thought or action etc) is right or wrong, but everything has its outcome. Outcome would be pleasant or unpleasant.

I have a firm belief in Varna system mentioned in mythology texts. But I do not believe that the varna system is having any rigidity in terms of birth. Varna should be by action, as it was made on the basis of actions only. So by this thought, you can say that a so called brahmin family can have a Shudra as well, or a Sudra family may have a Brahmin in it  as well. But how the lives of the family members turn out later will determine their Varna. Brahmin was defined in textures as someone who has great knowledge about the universe and has or aspires to have true knowledge of anything that happens in the world. I can not imagine that I am surrounded by such great minds in this era. Most of the people I live around with either focus on their jobs or about family. The standards set in mind by the definition of Brahmin  are so high that I do not see many people fit. May be this is also true because of a limited circle of my own life. It only surrounds family and job, and all matters associated with these two. Four varnas, I believe, are made in hierarchy. Lowermost is the one which depends on other three. The one above the lowermost is the one which sustains the life of the other three. The one above this one is the one which protects the other three and the top most one is the one which guides the other three.

True, I do aspire to have a life of knowledge, but it is to me a puzzle that I do not know how to solve. Also I am not having time to solve either. Like a soldier, have promises to keep, and some distance, if not miles, before I sleep.

Wish things would change some day! :)

Long Long lives

We humans live a long life, long enough to correct most of our mistakes before we depart from the world. Yet, it is not generally the trend. Many leave the world as if they wanted to live more and had some more things to do.

Comfort in Darkness

Songs, love, intimacy... I believe life having abundance of such parameters is a factor of luck and effort.
Some times the combinations do not match. Then love gets shattered, intimacy dies out, cacophony echoes. Loneliness suddenly becomes more comfortable than otherwise.

Dreams do come true, but in such a relationship, the ego tussles kill away even the feeble essence of dreaming to live happily ever after. Luck plays such an important role to guide our lives. Lives of partners become a heavy burden when they are bound only by strings of responsibility. No one is asked to love on marriage. That is implicit. What is asked of the couple is to be responsible and live together while keeping in mind vows of partnership.

Sometimes non-compatible personalities strung together are struck for life. Love tries to blossom but does not survive for long. Discontentment persists longer. Attempt to bring fun into the relationship is tried first, ignored often, hesitated sometimes later and discarded eventually.

Loneliness becomes a comfortable zone to stay in. Concepts like God, spirituality are hard to hold on to in such dark situations.

Said so, there are always better things to do in life than cling on to the sad part, even it it is related to someone who will be with you for whole of your life. Life will go on. Better focus on good things and make things better.

-/\-

 :)

Some exerpts from Ashtavakra Gita

I have already absorbed Bhagavad Gita (BG) in my blood, right since I first read in after 12th class. So majority of my decisions were based on the methods suggested in Gita. Its a good book for reading from everyone's perspective, from person of any religion, including atheists, provided that they assume that the things which they consider unbelievable or false can be true or right for someone else. Anyways, that was not the focus of my post here.

I was told about Ashtavakra Gita by Veni, my senior in Samsung. He accidentally met me in Andamans where I and my wife had gone to celebrate our new marriage. He told me that Gita is told by Krishna who was a 'Kushal Rajnitigya...Kushal Kutil Rajnitigya" (Expert Politician, Expert, cunning politician". So Whatever he says is interpreted by the readesr in their own ways, and while reading,  the readers find the solution in their own ways for themselves. Then Gita becomes a very relativistic book, meaning to say that the content of the book are likely to be interpreted differently by different people. So if I want to read an unwavering content that is expected from Bhagvad Gita, I should read Ashtavakra Gita(AG). Ashtavakra was Janak's Guru. Janak was Sita's father. Whatever Ashtavakra told Janak about the Truth, has been mentioned in Ashtavkra Gita.

The content of the AG is almost the same as what I remember in Gita, though the scientific and moral part mentioned in Bhagvad Gita are not mentioned in AG version of what I read.

In AG, the state of a free man has been mentioned. More or less it is the same, except that it does not mention about God. It says that even the God is nothing. And whatever God is, it is in everyone, so when nothing is there, an enlightened man does not go to anywhere in seeking God. He is content in himself. It mentions that even the mind is not a person's. It changes with the environment, and so does the nature of a person. An enlightened man is least interested in all these variations but remains peaceful with all these fluctuations going on around him.

The thing about mind, and the thing about God is what primarily looked to me different from Gita. May be because these two entities are not physically observable, hence in Gita, Krishna did not give any definition about them. Though he said that the mind has to be controlled, and that focus on God is necessary for enlightenment. So they were  open to interpretations, the definitions.

Overall, the new thought that I gained about God, that he does not have to be looked outside, something which many teachings already do, this thought has brought peace. I think it is a matter of time and age that this thought struck me at this point of time.

I would suggest that for a quick extract of BG, AG can be useful. But TO be in that state of mind so that one could understand AG, he has to read BG. :) ;)